So, Orientation happened. Not sure if i've already talked about it, but even if i hadn't i'm too tired and too lazy to actually reminisce and spill everything out. I've already told most of them to my FIRL(friends in real life), so yeah, no point in repeating myself. Anyway, first day of college was yesterday and it went by in quite a blur. Economics was my first class and boy, was it a big class. I didn't think i'd have anyone to sit or hang with that day, but luckily i bumped into Nelson and Ronald while waiting for the previous class to clear. Turns out, Nelson and I are going to class buddies for the rest of the semester so everywhere i go, he'd be there, right by my side. Talk about coincidences, huh? I'm sort of glad though and thankful because he's a really nice and easy going guy which came to me as a surprise because i couldn't quite get whatever he was always trying to say to me back in high school. But now that we've been together for two full days, i'm beginning to understand him better and i think he's going to be a great classmate. He definitely is good company so, thank you God, i owe you one.
First day of school didn't feel as nice as the second one and maybe it's because we had two subs today instead of the usual three on Mondays and god-knows what other days. As you can see, i haven't quite gotten the lay of my schedule yet, but it'll come to me in due time. Nelson and i hung with Valerie Sim and this new girl called Jennifer on the first day. We went to class together, had lunch together and although they're nice and friendly people, they're not exactly the best people to sit next to during class hours. They never pay attention and talk too damn much. It's not that i like listening in class or shutting up(i do like keeping to myself at times), but this is college and flunking college isn't something i'm out to give a try in. Yep, that shit's definitely not on my bucket list. So, i'll be giving in my all to not fall asleep in class or write or daydream about things that has never happened and will never happen in my life. I'll do my best to get Nelson in my good student loop too. We both absolutely do not need the bad grades.
Second day was a better day in my opinion because 1)i didn't have to deal big shitty classes. 2)i had more than enough time for lunch. 3)i ate with people who could speak in English without sounding like they can't. 4)i realized that Nelson is a nice guy. 5)i met with my best friend today. So yes, it was sort of a great day. The only bad part was when i came across a math problem which proved itself to be a problem. I honestly like math, but only when i'm able to get the right answer. Or an answer at least. I hate getting stuck because when i do i usually cry and then give up. The math tutorials were fine because my lecturer was pretty chill and i could get a solution immediately if i ask about my problem but when i had to do it on my own outside of class, i realize how incompetent my math skills are and i want to dig my eyes out or stab a pen through my brain(if that's even possible). It's the most annoying thing ever, to not know the solution to a math problem even if it's something you've seen countless times before or have even solved it once or twice in the past.
Oh, i'd like to tell you about this one guy i befriended through Suan. If you were to judge this guy solely from the vibes you get off of him as he waltzes around the school auditorium, it'd be that he's a show-off, an asshole and someone who thinks of himself as "the bomb". Emir stroke me as someone who strongly deserved a punch in the vagina(if he had one) as soon as he made this exclamation during a game of hopping-in-the-potato-sack. It was around the time when he yelled first one to fall is a whore! that i realized how much of an insolent dickhead he probably was and wanted to beat the crap out of the stupid smug smile he had on his face. Of course, it wouldn't have been a stupid smug smile if he was a little nicer or at least had a filter in his head, which he doesn't because half the things he says that apparently are supposed to come off as "humorous" are offensive to several types/classes of people in the society. He has the most unnecessary comebacks and add ons. In short, he really isn't someone you'd like to be stuck alone on an island with. If the heat doesn't get to you, his ignorance and stupidity will.
In the midst of defending those who have been rudely and wrongly accused of all-things-bad by horribly opinionated jerk-faced rave dude, i've managed to make a new friend who unfortunately was well-acquainted with asshole number 1. Although i don't know her all that well, she doesn't seem like she's stupid(in a moral sense) or has a mouth as bad as Emir's. She can be quite...a handful at times, but overall, she doesn't seem all that bad a company. She speaks both English and Mandarin but i doubt that she's all that into English movies or books and if she is, it'd be what every other teen in the world is reading or watching. How bitchy and judgmental of me to say so, but this is my online journal and only i read what i write and this is how i like things to be kept as long as i'm still doomed to walk this earth with my short and fragile chicken legs. Anyway, i'm not sure how her name is spelled so i'll just leave that part out for now. I'll get back to you when i get confirmation on her other info, e.g; personality, likes/dislikes, intellectual level, etc. Important stuff to know when making friends in college because everything you say or think about saying have to go through a quick but thorough process of filtering before letting them fly. So, it's best to know what to talk about and which topics to stay away from. I want to make enemies as much as i want to take intro math for a semester.
So far, this is how it is for me as an official college student. My current standing point:
1. I have classmates and schoolmates i can casually converse with.
2. I have identified the bitches i'll be killing in my head for the rest of my semester.
3. I have also identified my probable school clique(although not all of them are likable).
4. I have topped up my account for the college printing services.
5. I have yet to register as a library member but will do so first thing in the morning.
6. There are still realms of the unknown i have yet to venture into and i'm not keen on doing so due to natural human fear of the unknown.
7. I wish my friends were there with me.
8. I miss my friends a lot.
I know that i and every one of my friends know that i care a lot. A little too much most of the time, but it's not something that can be helped. I care about them and i care about me with them. I worry about our friendship, their future, my future, out future together...all sorts of things i really shouldn't be thinking about in the middle of a lecture or while trying to sleep at 1 in the a.m. I just, really like my friends. I like them a lot and i hope that only good things are set in their paths. I just wish they were here with me. College is honestly a lot of fun and i just can't help but wonder how much more fun it would've been if it was them i was genuinely laughing or having sensible conversations with instead of this bunch of new people whom i don't see as homie material. Yet. Haha. I still got my hopes up high and my head down low. Maybe i'm too quick to judge. Well, i sincerely hope that i'm wrong about my new schoolmates. Who knows if the cover i'm seeing now is all but a cover? Maybe their true self is hidden in there somewhere, just like mine. And all i have to do now is find it, find them. Maybe not all of them are as bad as i think of them to be. Eyes closed, fingers crossed.
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